Young man needs advice from mature adults!?

Ok everyone, I know this is senior citizens, but I'd like the answer from you guys. Most seniors I meet or talk to seem to be alot stronger mentally or full of serenity compared to me or someone my age. I want to know if you guys think it's just a generation thing, that you have always been like that, or that people actually CAN get better.... I'm 22, I get real depressed and anxious about things like relationships and life in general.... Do you guys know, or are you someone who had a hard time coping with life as a young adult...are you better now?


Thanks alot guys.Young man needs advice from mature adults!?
BRAVO for being so wise at such a young age - it took wisdom to ask the question from we who are so much older! :-)





I cannot really add to the wonderful responses given so far...ALL were great and said, in one way or another, what I would say. My least favorite decade was my 20's...loved my 30's and 40's though!...





You live and you learn and you grow if you are open minded and willing to benefit from mistakes rather than bemoan them. Hang in there and rainbows are ahead, albeit fleeting they are still awesome to behold even once!Young man needs advice from mature adults!?
Ok, I'm going to give you something to really think about. If you are a real


chicken-heart, just pass this on by, BUT


if you have no commitments like wife/


kids/lotsa bills, etc. Why not just go


bummin and find out who the hell you


are? I'm not talking to the next town,


I'm talking about necessities in a


duffle bag and catch the next plane


to Europe. Stay away from the war,


you don't need that. How about eastern europe where things are still


really cheap, or catch a freighter down


to the islands, or you can just bum


America. you will meet so many different people and have to get yourself out of so many circumstances


that you'll come back a new man.


If you come back that is. In America


the old ladies will at least feed you.


Farm country always gets you a good


meal. Why sit at home worrying when


you can be out doing???
Yes, yes, I remember being anxious about everything and I use to get really down alot also. I feel sad that times are so hard on kids, you have to grow up so fast. I use to believe in santa till I was in 6 grade! I was very niave. Life does become better as you mature. Things don't worry you so much, especially what other people think of you. Enjoy each day as it comes, you will be happier. don't worry about tomorrow either, it will come soon enough. Enjoy your friends and family.
Oh yes hon !! As you get older and experience more you learn new ways to deal with old and new situations alike !!! You will keep learning and learning.!!!! Life is chock full of Pop Quizzes !!! You are learning new things everyday !!!!
Sweetie the 20's are filled with angst and uncertainty for most people. I would NOT ever want to be 20 something again, 30 something yes -





No one in their early 20's knows who they are, never mind where they are going or what they really want out of life. About all they do know is that they suddenly realize they DONT know the answers after all.





When you are a teenager you think you know everything and your parents and other adults are just a bunch of clueless old fogies - but when you hit the real world, and have to make important decisions, about further education, job choices, etc you realize you dont know much after all.





Relax about a relationship, by the time you are 25 you wont be the same person you are at 22, you wont even recognize that person - give yourself time to grow, and mature and become secure in who you are and what you want.





The best advise I have to give you is remember that no one plans to fail, they just fail to plan. Sit down and decide where you want to be in five years, and in ten years - and follow the best path to your goals.





You arent unusual, scratch the surface of everyone who appears to be so confident and sure of themselves and underneath you will find they have the same angst and questions you have - relax, be the best you can be, find out the path you are meant to travel and make a plan on how to get there.





Take time to enjoy life.





Allow yourself to make mistakes along the way, we have all made mistakes, you take what you learned and move on - become your own best friend.





Goldwing once more reminded me of something I often tell people ';if there were no shadows you wouldnt be able to see or enjoy the sunshine';. Life is a series of highs and lows and some smooth sailing in between, dont reach for pill or a drink, just relax and enjoy the ride, and before you know it you will be out of the shadows and walking in sunlight again -





Thought of something else I tell my kids, ';if you arent scared your arent growing';. All of life's decision come with that fear that you may not be making the RIGHT decision, but no matter what they all come with an opportunity to learn something from. If you arent scared once in awhile then you are just standing still stagnating -
People change as they move along in age. And, for a lot of them, things get better. When I was a teenager I passed out leaflets and stuffed envelopes for the Socialist Party. Now, in my late 60s, I'm even more conservative than Attila the Hun. One becomes a conservative when he has something to conserve. Over the years I went from a cold-water tenament apartment in Brooklyn to a three bedroom home with a pool in Southern Nevada, with a lot of stops in other countries and states.


When I was 22 I was a drunk. A year later, after consuming too much booze, I quit cold turkey. I've been sober ever since. All I can advise you is to live life. Live it to the fullest. Enjoy the time you have because it moves along so quickly. If you settle for the routine, the humdrum, the safe way to go, you will wind up wondering why you missed grabbing that brass ring on the carousel of life.


But, never get too complacent and ignore the wisdom of Warneke's Law which says the odds are eight to five that the light at the end of the tunnel is on the front of an oncoming train. Make your life such an adventure that your epitaph on your grave could read: I came. I saw. I had a ball!
It is part of being young. When you are young, everything is life or death..little gray area. You have a fight with your girlfriend and you know you will never see her again...but you do. You get depressed, you think things will never be better, only worse, but you wake up the next morning and things are much better. You think that killing yourself is the only way out, but a day later you are having the time of your life. NOPE, not you, just your age. Chill out, hand in there...it gets better as you experience life, learn that there are patterns in life that repeat..you will, eventually be saying to yourself, ';here we go again!'; Trust me, we have all been there, done that, and lived through it. Calm down, nothing is going to kill you, depression comes and goes, it is just part of life. Hell, if you do not have occasional depression, how are you going to know what real happiness feels like? What you are going through is called STRESS...we all go through it at times, it sucks the big one, but we learn to deal with it as we age. What seems like a mountain today is actually a molehill in disguise! Please learn to laugh more and fret less...things ALWAYS work out how they are going to work out...you cannot press them, for they will break. Pay attention to what you can change, accept what you cannot change...and you will be much happier in the long run. You have my sympathy (I have been there often), and my hopes that you soon realize that this is just life. hang in there, and peace, Goldwing.
It seems I was always depressed and anxious during this age. It does and will get better. You have some real high pressure situations going on in yur life right now. Facing your life and your future.Its got to be tough but you will make it because you realize that you have this going on inside your head. I have been better for a very long time. Hope I helped.
People your age are concerned about relationships, and so on. I see 22 as being close to being a teenager...not to put you down, but compared to me. Don't get into too big of a hurry to settle down, as you are better off to wait a little longer that rush it and end in divorce. Take time, as you have a life time. Figure out who you are first! I see things as getting better as you get older. I wasn't one to worry about social things when younger or now. I figured myself out then and now...and enjoy life. I believe age usually brings maturity.
Nick...that is normal! At your age you see things a lot different from anyone.





It would be best to seek advice from others who have been down that same lane.





Digest what you feel is best for you and trash others that won't help you in any way!





Good Luck Buddy!
I am myself and people never like that about me. I am a person that don't care about fitting in at school and wont people to know me. Life had slaped me in the faces hard and it is so bad I do not care what the other people in my age are doing. There is no need to be depress becasue the bad thing you can do is be someone you are not.
The statement ';accept life on life's terms'; really spoke to me.


My expectations just never seemed to materialize and as I looked around the corner I lost sight of where I was standing. Try to enjoy the moment because looking back it may have been your finest.


Knowing that things are exactly as they should be at this point in time provides security for us to make needed changes. Everything happens for a reason and difficult relationships are teaching experiences.


We never stop learning to improve the quality of our lives if we want to and when a 22 yr old has wisdom enough to ask a question like this he's ahead of the game in my opinion.


Blessings too you...Juju
Everyone has been through the '; where's my life going'; phases. I don't agree with the generation of the older groups as having an easier life than those of us in the younger years.


They have lived thru the hard and depressing times in their lives, just the same way you will too.





Hell, your only 22 with a lot of life still to live. Maybe since the older generations has been thru what you are now going thru they have a peace in the way they live now. They may also realize that everyday should be a good hearted day since it may be their last. Not to sound mean or disturbed here, yet some older folks know their times is coming and they live it without fear or depression and live for today.





Even with a depressing younger life, you still can find what your looking for and has a happy future.





Nobody can change what makes you happy except yourself.





Just my 2 cents.
Well I'm not a senior, but lots closer to that than I am to 22....I find that the older I get, the less 'urgent' things become. I am alot more content with things than I was. Not that everythings the way I think it should be, or that life turned out the way I wanted it to....but I guess I realize that some things I have some control of and other things I don't, and I am ok with that. I also find that the older I get the more forgiving I become. I excuse faults in people, because no-one is perfect. And I'm also no longer in such a hurry. I try to find time to find something pleasing to my soul at least a couple times a week, and I suspect that will increase in frequency as I continue on this journey called life. I've learned that there's a difference between being right and being righteous. And you can be one without being the other. Life is a road and you can choose to travel a super highway or a gravel road. It's yours to live. Don't stress on little things. I have found for myself that if I take care of today, tomorrow will be ok.
of course you can get better,or worse,the point is we can all change,dear.life is all about change.


right now it's probably as hard for you as it will ever be,if you are anything like me or the folks I know.as I got older,I got perspective,and experience is always good for emotional grounding.when you're very young you pretty much have to take everything on faith! hang in there,and pay attention on the way.it does get a lot better.
I am not a senior citizen, but I want to take a stab at this. I am middle aged and I think that people change over time. I look back into my twenties and realize now that I am a different person. Things that mattered to me back then are not important at all now. When you are in your teens and twenties you think that time just wont go fast enough. Then you start realizing that time is flying by to quickly. You have probably heard your parents or grandparents say this and thought it was BS. Let me tell you it isn't. Life is too short to be worried all the time. Just try to be care free and enjoy yourself, life is full of obstacles and you can't do anything but ';pull yourself up by your own bootstraps';. That is quote from FDR. At the time when he was president things were bad. He said that to people to get them to realize that the only way to survive was to help yourself. Could you see a president today saying that in a speech? The other leaders in this country would chastise him for being too hard on the people. ';How could he expect people to help themselves';, they might say. Your generation has been coddled to death. Every ill feeling you have is labeled a mental condition, at least that is what you have been told. Every human being on the face of the earth has been depressed or anxious about something in their life. It can't be a ';chemical inbalance'; like they want you to believe. The senior citizens that are alive today had it much worse then you could ever imagine. They lived through the depression, WWII and most of them had to work their asses of for everything they have. College was a dream to most. Their life experience made them hard and the Serenity you see was built from those hard times. As is the mental strength. Don't think that they aren't depressed, but their depression is from the abandonment they feel from society. Abandonment from their families who are too busy in their daily lives to spend time with them. They just hide it better. Go do something with your life, you won't get a second chance.
I believe everybody gets better.





I can't say that I had a hard time coping with life in my youth but I was anxious about things like marriage, being a good mom, getting my own place, having a good paying job, etc.. I would get depressed, but I would not live there or entertain it. But each time you reach an obstacle in life and you are victorious, this will make you stronger. The serenity will come when you realize what is really important in life and what is not. You just have to live and experience ups and downs, trials and errors, before you get to that point. But there is hope for you. So keep a stiff upper lip and don't let life get you down.
It's normal........I do have to say that I wouldn't trade shoes for anything with you. I will...without a doubt say you have a much harder world to live in than I could even imagine.





I told my own kids that because my Dad did know what I was going through.....I don't know what kids are going through today. I said to my kids that for the first time I truly believed we really didn't have a clue what the 'New generation '; was going through. You are different. You are dealing with things I never even thought of.





I can not say I'm not better.......this world has changed and I don't know what to do anymore


either.





Do me a favor....when you get the new rule book...send me a copy.